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DREAM ACHIEVING GODESSES DO HARD THINGS

Hello My Gorgeous [FIRST NAME GOES HERE]!

My greatest professional dream has been consistent since age fifteen. The idea was crystal clear. Remind women of their undeniable self-worth so they could achieve their dreams. I’m a believer that self-worth is the fuel to women living their most authentic life, and these women do not raise the white flag in the face of adversity. They are flexible, agile wild cats that know it’s only a matter of time before they fall on their feet. They do hard things, scared.

Most people would say I was a late bloomer to the taking scary action part of achieving my dream. I was slow but steady, until something out of a Tony Robbins documentary occurred that shifted everything I believed was possible for me.

It was February 10th 2020, a gorgeous afternoon in Los Angeles.

My heart is about to pound onto the hardwood floor in my living room, which would royally suck since my husband is a germaphobe.

My palms are bright red and on fire.

My mouth is so cotton ball dry I can barely get sound out.

The mean girl in my head starts again “who do you think you are being an interviewed expert on a live summit with guests like Jack Canfield?” She had a point. What if they realize I’m having trouble speaking without tears about to well up like traitors exposing my ultimate fear of looking stupid.

Me. The enthusiastic coach, preaching like a practiced priestess on her pulpit, “What you want is outside your comfort zone,” about to be on the receiving end of her message. I speak this comfort zone phrase daily with a whole heart and an unwavering belief. I wasn’t prepared for the ultimate challenge that tested my courage to step into the arena when it came to my biggest fear of public speaking.

Public speaking was a few 100 miles past the comfort zone yard line of what my ego could handle. It became crystal clear, that in order to support women to achieve their greatest dreams (with the impact of my dream), I would have to break down my armor and risk being seen. I knew I had to face my dragon to encourage others to meet their own.

The interview was a 30 min surreal experience. I couldn’t help being distracted by my own stoic reflection on the Zoom application displayed on my screen. The interviewers’ questions were rhythmic and each sent a low grade current down my belly. At about halftime, my responses seemed to come from outside of me. My practice of becoming the observer magically kicked in at the perfect time. I was able to see myself in conversation with a carefree confident Oprah-Esque ease. My heart took the reigns and my fear subsided.

The magic words were spoken, “where can people find you” and the highest sense of accomplishment seeped through my veins.

I felt bulletproof.

It didn’t matter that it may take years before I make the impact of my dreams. What counted was, that after all of these years of mastering the art of live video escapism, I showed up and did my version of hard.

Fast forward a few weeks, one of my biggest dreams of being interviewed on a podcast came true. Twice! With my momentum at an all-time high, I also signed two separate consulting contracts.

We all have our personal fear dragons.

The next time yours shouts “who do you think you are to (fill in the blank)?”

Stand tall and simply respond “who am I not to?”

And continue ruling you my sister.

With Love Always!!

Irene

Preview of my first Podcast first interview

Irene is the creator of the Happiness Within Reach program which coaches high-achievers on how to create a more holistic approach to success. This teaches leaders evidence-based techniques to building more meaningful interpersonal connections while simultaneously growing their self-confidence and productivity. She is an ICF, ACC Certified life and business coach who holds two certifications from the University of Pennsylvania on Positive Psychology and is trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy. Irene has helped hundreds of professionals get reacquainted with their hearts most affirming personal and professional desires and supports them to take action despite their fears. Her mission is to remind her clients of their indisputable worthiness and capability of creating an extraordinary life aligned with their highest truth.https//happinesswithinreach.com

 

3 Relationship Hacks for Real Love Right Now!

Hello Beautiful,

I hope you are staying healthy and remembering to believe in big things!

The below blog is on how to build your character and confidence to bring in your perfect partner.

Harvard’s longest running study proved that the quality of our relationships are the single largest predictors of the quality of our lives. After nineteen years of marriage and relentlessly examining the findings of relationship experts; I can say without hesitation and a huge dose of gusto that the most important relationship of our lives is the one we have with ourselves. Taking the steps to creating the most irresistible version of our self is the portal to being ready for the magical and meaningful love story we desire.

Nourishing our inner child, being responsible for our happiness and letting go of the sexual patterns that do not serve us, play an essential role in the satisfaction of our romantic relationships. We make more insightful partner choices when we’ve invested in our personal development bank account. Settling for crumbs is no longer an option when we know who we are and feel enthusiastic about the trajectory of our life.

Instead of wondering what it takes to stop repeating unhealthy relationship cycles put your focus on the three fundamentals for real love right now, and watch what real transformation looks like!

  • Embrace your inner child’s needs. Often, we dive into relationships wide eyed and bushy-tailed expecting this new romance to be the missing link to the life of our dreams. In the movie Jerry Maguire Tom Cruise’s famous quote “you complete me” was a perfect depiction of how so many of us expect our love interest to transform our lives. This will usually end up looking like a Picasso painting. I know since I’ve shared many not so romantic evenings with spatulas of Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough ice cream before acknowledging that I had to do the uncomfortable inner-work. Prior to feeling emotionally safe in any relationship it was necessary to learn to love myself and meet my needs so I could stop repeating painful love patterns. Maybe your inner child’s greatest fear is losing your freedom so you perpetually sabotage relationships when things get too close. This is a classic. Whatever your pattern, it’s worth paying attention to what situations and emotions trigger (an emotional response that is not equal to the event) you most. These are great indicators of childhood trauma that hasn’t yet been resolved. Awareness, belly-breathing, witnessing your reactions as an observer and listening to the messages of your body are great stepping stones to finally ending unsatisfying relational loops.
  • Be the sole provider of your happiness. Happy women are irresistible! Women who are intentional about creating a life they feel excited about are radiant and confident. According to Martin Seligman, one of the founding fathers of Positive Psychology, the five building blocks to happiness can be remembered by the acronym, P.E.R.M.A; Positive Emotion, Engagement, Positive Relationships, Meaning and Accomplishment. Make a conscious effort to show up from a place of abundance by loving your life prior to meeting your one. Schedule weekly recurring time for activities that evoke positive emotions and get you into flow state (pleasurable experience’s that seem to stop time and shuts down our inner critic). Even one hour a week of in real life time with friends or family has the power to transform your emotional state from black and white to technicolor. Accomplish small goals daily that will move you closer to your long-term dream. Add meaning to your life by being of service to a cause greater than yourself. Performing acts of kindness, volunteering for an organization you feel connected to or creating fun, non-tech rituals with your children can be hugely gratifying.
  • No sex before commitment. This fundamental is especially for heterosexual women that desire a monogamous long-term relationship with a masculine man. I know, I know, I’m going to get a lot of resistance here. There is a real modern-day treasure in Dr Pat Allen’s old-school teachings on “no free sex.” This encourages women to avoid being sexually intimate with men prior to a commitment. Dr. Pat Allen is a sought-after transactional analyst, relationship expert and author who has made four appearances on the Oprah show, need I say more? On a physiological level, when a woman has even just one sexual encounter with a man, the hormone oxytocin is released which causes her to feel the magic bonding high of falling in love. This will keep her emotionally attached and ruminating about him, sometimes for years despite him having no intention of pursuing anything more than that single evening. Dr. Allen’s definition of commitment is, an agreement that you are both sexually and socially monogamous (it is clear to friends, family and social media that you’re not single) and you have negotiated continuity (how often you’ll see each other and talk that is comfortable for both of you). Sharing our bodies this intimately, too early in a relationship is like offering our most feminine gift to someone that has not proven they are worthy of it yet. This takes our power away and never feels good the following morning. In a world where everything is instant maybe there is something to be said about waiting and really getting to know each other. Maybe old school should be new school.

Sending you love and light!

Heres to taking our own breath away,

xoxo

Irene Abbou

 

 

Irene is the creator of the Happiness Within Reach program which coaches ambitious women to open their hearts to self-love while forming meaningful interpersonal relationships with others. She is an ICF, ACC Certified life and business coach who holds two certifications from the University of Pennsylvania on Positive Psychology and is trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy. This integrates forty years of scientific research, based on the Sound Relationship House Theory. Irene has helped hundreds of women get reacquainted with their hearts most affirming personal and professional desires and supports them to take action despite their fears. Her mission is to remind women of their indisputable worthiness and capability of creating the extraordinary soul on fire life that is their birthright.

IT’S OK: WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER

Image by: Nathan Fertig

Hello Sweet [FIRST NAME GOES HERE],

Once in a while we are given a moment when our hearts soften and we dare to imagine an even more inspiring existence than we ever have before.

Despite my imagination taking me to dark places during this craziness, this morning was one filled with grace. As I sat weary-eyed warmly wrapped in my pink blanket sipping my coffee, I felt a rush of hope and dare I say a glimpse of excitement for the near future. It was as if my inner relentless three-year-old who tirelessly pushes me to keep on keeping on, found a moment of serenity of her own.

The wiser part of me was reminded that with some stillness and silence our innate fairy G-D mother has the courage to sit beside us, hold us warmly and show us that life can still be full of magic, even in the midst of uncertainty.

I know we collectively fear the ground beneath is crumbling. What is really happening is the roots of our beautiful earth of mother nature are resourcing and re-energizing to create an even more solid ground for us to feel safe on. I also know these current circumstances are not easy. I have days where I feel like I’m going to lose my mind but in the center of my heart I know we are all so much more resilient and capable of adapting than we give ourselves credit for.

Being physically separated from our loved ones, the ambiguity of keeping our jobs combined with the anxiety of not knowing when we will be able to leave our homes without feeling suffocated by a mask will not last forever. This will end. As we speak it is slowly coming to an end.

So, if right now your logical brain took a trip to burning man leaving you in a state of mush-brain cabin fever funk, be compassionate with yourself.

If you’re feeling scared, angry or confused…. its ok.

If your work-outs have gone to shit ……its ok

If your evening glass of wine has turned into two ….. its ok

If you haven’t washed your hair in three days….. its ok.

If, in a few days or a couple of hours you have a little more energy, its also ok to take a ten min yoga class on YouTube, start the first page of your book, brainstorm a more exciting career path or simply take a soothing shower. Warm showers always make such a difference for me when my mind needs friendly reminder that it’s not the boss of me. Do whatever feel’s right for you at this moment, with an open heart and zero judgement.

Old unhealthy energy is clearing, new inspiring energy is entering and wonderful things are on their way to you.

We really are all in this together.

You are not alone!

If you don’t have anyone to reach out to, I am here. Email me at irene@happinesswithinreach.com and we can share a conversation over a cup of tea.

If you know someone that may feel alone, please reach out and remind them that they too are not alone. Let’s be there for one another and remember that there is no greater healer than the power of human connection.

Sending Love & Light,

Irene Abbou
https//www.happinesswithinreach.com

@irene.abbou

 

The Subtle Art of Attracting a Modern Masculine Man


“God made man stronger but not necessarily more intelligent. He gave women intuition and femininity. And, used properly, that combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I’ve ever met.”

Farrah Fawcett

Are you an ambitious powerhouse woman on a path to financial freedom but also desire to attract a successful confident man?

 

Have you devoted many, many years of your life to achieving a kick-ass career you can feel proud of but a small part of you feels discouraged with online dating? Are you worried you wouldn’t even know what a healthy romantic relationship looks like if it bit your butt on one of your nature hikes? You’re are not alone.

 

It’s common to not be enthusiastic about getting back in the dating scene when your comfortable happy place is creating visions for your next business deal. It does take emotional and physical energy to get your body to meet-ups, networking events or even a best friends dinner party where you were asked to look hot as a great single guy would also be joining. And hey…you just never know right?

 

Since you’re already Queen Bee at managing and orchestrating systems and processes to get great results in business, we are going to use this to your advantage! I encourage you to perceive attracting a partner as your next top priority project.

 

It is scientifically proven that the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives so being proactive about attracting your soul mate is clearly worthwhile and highly recommended for a happier life. Dan Gilbert a Harvard psychologist teaches us that married people are significantly the happiest, when compared to cohabitating, singles, divorced and ones that are separated.

 

I know first-hand that it’s 100% possible to attract a man that is strong, confident and wants a partner to share the finer things in life with. It takes getting familiar and implementing a few skills you may not have even know lived inside of you. I’m going to concentrate on the one I find to be the most transformative for badass boss ladies.

 

Are you ready for it?

 

CONNECT TO YOUR FEMININE ENERGY.

 

Your feminine or yin energy is the most powerful source of energy you possess! This is especially true to becoming irresistible to a masculine man that naturally wants to provide and protect. These men are motivated to be the pursuer. They find irresistible the part of a woman that is graceful, mysterious and playful. Women that are non-reactive, flowing with what is and accepting when others extend their support works like a magnet for them. It has a way of directing their attention as it emits an aura of self-worth and abundance, and that’s sexy as hell!

 

Some other ways to re-establish a friendship with your feminine side looks like allowing a man to make the first moves (first few moves), looking him in the eyes and smiling (don’t physically move towards him first), appreciate his compliments, affection and attempts to be the problem solver.

 

Making time to be creative (cooking, writing, painting, dancing) also drives our divine feminine to shine. This occurs through slowing down our prefrontal cortex (the portion of our brain responsible for self-censorship and inhibition) which turns down the volume of our inner critic. The idea is to experience our activities, enter the world of our senses without so much concern for the outcome.

 

Ambitious women can absolutely attract and create a fulfilling partnership with a masculine man. The secret sauce for this power couple to thrive is for women to remove their warrior armor after work and shift in to her feminine superpowers.

I am sending you love and hope you are safe and keeping your chin up.

xoxox,

Irene

 

If you are looking for more support and guidance on your journey to developing the foundational skills of thriving relationships and building your self-worth, you can set up a complimentary soul session with me at www.happinesswithinreach.com under Schedule.

Irene is the creator of the Happiness Within Reach program which coaches ambitious women to open their hearts to self-love while forming deep and vulnerable relationships with others. She is an ICF, ACC Certified life and business coach who holds certifications from the University of Pennsylvania on Positive Psychology and is trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy.

How to Prioritize to Reach your Soul on Fire Goals Fast Broadcast


Hello, My Gorgeous Ones!

If you’re anything like I used to be, you may start each morning half past dead, on your third cup of almond milk latte anxious as all get out to confront the boxes of your never-ending to-do list. Then you may take an extra 20 (mixed-up minutes) to determine what it is you need to tackle first to make it a productive day. The truth is, there really is an easier way. Setting aside 20 minutes each evening to determine our highest priority for the following day, would allow us more free time to do what we love while making real progress to set our goals on fire.

There are various schools of thought for prioritizing our time, but I’d like to share the one method that has made my life so much easier. Let me repeat …sooooooo much easier! Here it goes.

Think of all of the items on your to-do list as little pockets of excess fat stuck to your body. I apologize for the visual, but stay with me. Some of these pockets are fifty pounds of saturated fat, while others are just a measly two or three.Your goal is to identify the two most substantial pockets of fat (your most dreaded, difficult essential tasks) and get that done first thing in the morning before allowing yourself to begin on any other project.

James Clear, author of Atomic Habits and someone I have great respect for, often speaks of The Ivy Lee Method. This is a method formulated in the early 1900s by a successful American publicity expert named Ivy Lee. The story is that one of the richest men in this period, C. Schwab hired Lee to help him increase productivity in his steel corporation. When asked how much he was going to charge him, Lee responded, “nothing, unless it works. Just give me fifteen minutes with each of your executives. If after three months it works, you can pay me what you think it was worth.”

Ivy Lee’s suggestions to the executives for optimal peak productivity was the following:

1. At the end of each workday write down no more than six tasks you need to complete the next day, to achieve your objectives;

2. Rank these in order of importance;

3. Each morning, begin with the most important task and DO NOT MOVE ON TO THE NEXT UNTIL THIS ONE IS COMPLETE;

4. Work your way through the rest of the tasks from the most important to the least;

5. At the end of the day, move any unfinished tasks to a new list for the following day; and

6. Repeat this process daily.

The Ivy Lee Method worked so well that Mr. C. Schwab ended up writing Ivy Lee a check of $25,000 (the equivalent of over $400,000 today).

If You’re Not Sure of What Your Priorities Should Be:

(Answer the following questions and keep them as clear as possible.)

  • What are your soul on fire goals personal/business for 2020?
  • What are your values (these should align with your goals)?
  • What will your future self thank you for accomplishing?
  • What are your responsibilities?

Extra Hacks to Succeed:

  • Set an evening reminder, so you don’t forget to write your list;
  • Do Not Disturb: Put your phone in another room and turn off the pings and digs until your tasks are complete;
  • Set Time Blocks: Buy a kitchen timer and set it for an hour before beginning task one. When it rings, take a 10-minute break then repeat timer until you are done. This will provide your brain the break it needs to be diligent;
  • Print and track your accomplished tasks on a tracker to satisfy your minds desire for immediate rewards; and
  • A small reward at the end of the day if you shed the two most prominent fat pockets is a great way to stay motivated to repeat the following day

My wish for you this week is to utilize the Ivy Lee Method to get your most essential tasks done, so you reach the goals that make you excited to wake up in the morning. Please remember to always integrate self-care or brain breaks throughout the day, so you do not burn out or get sick.

Feel free to email me at irene@happinesswithinreach if you would like me to email you a free Habit Tracker Worksheet to more easily track your successes and feel like you are moving forward.

Irene is the creator of the Happiness Within Reach program, which coaches professional success-driven women to open their hearts to self-love while forming deep and vulnerable relationships with others. She is an ICF, ACC Certified life and business coach who holds certifications from the University of Pennsylvania on Positive Psychology and is trained in the Gottman Method for Couples Therapy. This integrates forty years of scientific research, based on the Sound Relationship House Theory. Irene has helped hundreds of women get reacquainted with their hearts most affirming desires. Her mission is to remind women of their indisputable worthiness and capability of creating the extraordinary soul on fire life that is their birthright.